Secret Blog 49

Hello.  How is everyone?  I bet you can’t tell what I’m thinking about right now.  I bet I don’t want to tell you.  I bet it’s not very interesting anyway.  Still, I bet you’re curious to know.

I’m debating in my mind whether I want to tell you guys what I’m thinking or not.  I think I might pass.  I guess I have that option.

Is it wrong to toy with your audience like this?  Does it make me an evil writer?  What would redeem me from this junk?

I’m sorry.  What was I talking about again?

Tonight feels like a hiccup to me.  I feel like I’ve had one too many Dr. Peppers and I should probably go to sleep pretty soon.  I’m trying to wrestle something worthwhile out of my brain but… I feel dry and tired.  Is that okay?  Will you go easy on me tonight, audience?  I’m nearing the end of these Secret Blog entries.  I’ve been imagining in my head like my blogs are really popular like Lost and I’m trying to end this series with a bang.  Sadly, I don’t think I’m hitting it.  I keep thinking that there’s a certain hour of the day where my thoughts are ripest and for some reason I’m never writing during that time.  I have this belief though.  I believe that the part of me that is sensitive to being able to tell if I’m wring meaningful stuff is numb.  Or, my filter has had so much junk pumped through it that it can’t tell what’s not so great anymore.  It’s not a very fun feeling.

Can you tell that I’m grasping at air right now?  Maybe it would be better to put this entry off for a more inspired time.  Would that even be good?  Maybe I’m touching on something good here but I just can’t see it myself.  I’m trying to believe that that is possible.  I’m sure it is.

You know what I’m really happy about right now?  It’s not a huge deal… It’s that I just bought two boxes of Swiss Miss hot chocolate at Target tonight.  I put hot chocolate in my coffee, see.  And I’ve been out.  And I’ve been missing it.  But now I have it back.  Isn’t that great?

Well, that’s all I can think about right now.  That’s as far as my thoughts can go.  And I feel satisfied about it.  But I’m having to blabber for a minute to fill up this blog space.  That’s what’s going on.

I really am sleepy.  I could get to sleep pretty soon tonight.  I’ve had trouble sleeping the last couple of nights.  I’ve been just laying in bed.  I think tonight will be different.

Good grief.  I was gonna delete this and start over but I’m so tired.  I can’t think.  Maybe I’ll wake up in the morning and delete this.  That would be smart.  Until then though, this is my 49th Secret Blog post.

Just a little bit more later.  Peace.

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