A Naked Woman Walking Down the Street

I ate dinner tonight at Pei Wei with my mother.  Afterwards she was wanting to take me over to a Walmart because she had a 20 dollar gift card and I was needing razors and soap.  

So we were driving over to the Walmart on Basswood.  For those of you who don’t know this is a pretty nice neighborhood and it was one of those Walmart Neighborhood Market stores.  

She had asked me to drive her car because she just had a glass of chardonnay.  As I was pulling into the Walmart I looked over for a second to see what looked like a man walking along the sidewalk towards us.  Maybe thirty feet away.

Then I took another look and thought, “That guy has small boobs.”  Then I looked down and thought that the guy must’ve had  flesh-colored shorts on.  And I kept looking and realized that there were no shorts on the guy.  There was nothing!  And there wasn’t one of those things guys have.  It was blank.  So I asked my mother:

“Is that a naked woman walking on the sidewalk right there?”

She looked over and said, “Oh my ga’!  Jeffrey, that girl is NAKED!!”

“Oh my ga’,” I said.

That’s when we completely forgot about Walmart.

I drove so slowly in stun mode.  My mom and I stared in shock and bewilderment.  “WHAT IS HAPPENING??!  WHAT IS GOING ON?  WHY IS THAT GIRL NAKED?!”  We pulled into a parking spot and mumbled like zombies to each other as she made her way through a crosswalk filled with cars. With families.  With little kids. In minivans and stuff.  Right in the middle of traffic.

A naked lady.  

While the sun was still shining.  And everybody in their cars slowed down.  And nobody tried to pick her up.  My mom said, “I’d pick her up but I don’t want her sitting on my car seats…  Should we call 911?”

Me:  “Uh, I don’t know… is this an emergency?  This is psycho.  I guess… Yeah, call ’em…”

So she dialed and when the dipacher picked up my mom said, “I don’t know if this is an emergency but there is-

“-a naked woman walking down the street?!”  finished the dispacher.


Then the dispacher informed my mother that they had had SEVERAL calls and my mom told me later that she could hear people in the background at the 911 office giggling.

We were going to go into the Walmart to get my things but my mom said, “Let’s follow where that girl went and see what happened.”  

And it was her car so she was the boss so we drove in the general direction.  And as we went there were many people pulled over to the side of the road and people standing on the sidewalk with shocked looks on their faces and laughing nervously.

We pulled up a little further and there were three police cars on the side of the road and I guess they picked her up.

I’m still a little in shock.  I wasn’t expecting to see that tonight.

Yeah, definitely not.

I have been googling around but I haven’t found any information about it.  Then I remembered how strange it is to google “naked lady.”    

I don’t know.  Crazy story, thought I’d pass it on.

  1. wow funny story, ever find out what was happening???

    You, really ought to publish some of these stories makes me think of Dave Barry type stuff.

    • kristen
    • May 14th, 2009

    nate read this to me. i laughed so hard i cried. i hope that you are doing well and enjoying texas. let’s catch up next time i’m out there ok?

    • Natalie
    • May 14th, 2009

    Have you found anything else on this? My house backs up to Basswood between Park Vista and 377. My friend was leaving my house when he called and said that there was a naked girl walking down Basswood. His reaction was a lot like you described. I never saw her, the police were all over by the time we checked. He did state that the only thing that she was wearing was a bracelet that might have been a medical bracelet. Hummm, strange. I’ll keep searching and please post if you find any info.

    • therockingfeelings
    • May 14th, 2009

    I looked through the websites of several of the local news networks and I couldn’t find anything about this story. I felt bad because in reality it is probably a very sad story.

    I haven’t heard of any details but I’m obviously curious. It is definitely not every day that you see a woman walking down the street without any clothes. I told my mother that this was probably a once in a life time situation.

    Natalie- There were SOOO many people who saw this. Basswood was crowded. I can’t imagine not hearing any more about this. I did notice that the train that runs along 377 had completely stopped just before it got to Basswood. I was wondering if the police had to ask them to stop because a naked woman was walking down the street.

    All I know is that I saw it. And my mom saw it too so that’s how I know I’m not crazy.

    • therockingfeelings
    • May 14th, 2009

    Natalie- Sounds like that girl walked right past your house!

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