This seems out of the ordinary for me but I just want to say this… I want to say that I am thankful that God is good.  I am thankful that he is so full of love.  It blows my mind.  I hate talking about this stuff in a way because it just makes it awkward for some readers but I just want to say that I am glad that God is so good.  

Is that possible to say without seeming ridiculous?  I mean, when I say that I am thankful for the love of God, all I can think about are the people who would laugh at me and say I was stupid.  I don’t mean it cheesy.  I just want to say it because I am feeling it.  I am very thankful for the love of God.  I am because I can’t do anything.  And God is always faithful.  He is always true and it gives me so much peace.  

I’m sorry.  I really do have a hard time trying to say this without feeling silly.  I am not trying to be preachy, I just want to be honest here.  Is it okay?  I wish I said this more.  I think I’m pretty redundant as a writer.  I say the same stuff mostly.  

I used to try to say this stuff more but then I realized that most people that listened to me (like 90 percent of them) weren’t interested in hearing about God.  So I tried to talk about other things but… sometimes there’s just nothing worth talking about but God.  Sometimes all of the other topics just seem like a waste.

I have a hard time wanting to talk about God because I feel like such a moron about it.  I mean, when you tell people about God it’s like you should know something yourself and I am not that perfect anyway.  So I am talking in faith here.  Because I just want to.  

When I say God I mean Jesus.  Or at least that’s my faith. Or… I don’t know… I don’t know if it’s worth getting into a theological debate.  I don’t like those things.  I know that they’re important, just… it seems like everybody comes at this stuff differently.  

It’s hard when you don’t know who you’re talking to when you are talking about stuff like this.  I guess I want to explain my faith a little. I don’t know why I’m doing this, I just felt like it suddenly.  Maybe the Spirit is leading me.  People say that kind of stuff sometimes.  I am not sure what it means personally but maybe it’s happening right now…. uh… who knows?   Maybe there will be a healing on my blog… try this… touch this part of the screen just to see what happens  (    )   Touch between the parenthesis and see if you are cured of some ailment.  I don’t know if it’ll work… I prayed about that little spot on your computer screen.  Maybe it will help you feel Jesus’s power in your heart. 

Did you feel it?  Maybe it’s like electricity or like… maybe it’s like heat or like a shock… maybe it’s like a feeling of calmness or… I mean, I don’t know.. it’s between you and Jesus after all!  

Sorry, I’m new at this internet healing stuff.  I tried to touch the little space on my own computer screen but nothing magical happened.. maybe it only works for other people.  I’ll pray that it will work for you and if it does I guess just leave a comment on my page and we can celebrate somehow.

Wait, I meant to talk about Jesus.  Okay, let’s see here… Jesus… Jesus… Jesus… yeah… Jesus apparently was God.  God was Jesus.  That’s what Christians are supposed to believe.  Jesus was/is God and he lived on Earth just like us and he was perfect and then he got murdered because they said he was blaspheming God by saying he was God.  That’s one of the ironic things about it.  It’s like, if you don’t believe that Jesus was God then yeah, he was blaspheming… but if he really was God (like Christians believe) then he was just telling the truth and everybody thought he was crazy.  C.S. Lewis said that Jesus was either a liar, a lunatic or he was who he said he was: God (and savior of the world).  If he wasn’t really the savior of the world than Christians are wasting their lives and should be pitied above all other men.  That’s what Paul said, (in reference to the resurrection) that if Jesus did not triumph over death than Christians are to be pitied (1 Corinthians 15).

It’s so crazy to me.  I am not good at always believing this.  I am a realist I guess.   Well, some people call themselves realists and believe in Jesus and some people call themselves realists and don’t believe.  I try to believe, meaning that I pray that God will help me to believe.  And I’m pretty corrupt at times.  Not pure-hearted for sure.  Quite selfish and egomaniacal? Yes!  I have to pray about this stuff.  I am often extremely doubtful that anybody really cares about this stuff.  And if I am talking to people about it I usually feel like I am wasting somebody’s time and should talk about music or something.  But I don’t say that to make myself seem humble… I mean… in my mind… nobody would ever believe in this stuff…In my mind  everybody would quickly dismiss it all as hocus pocus, weirdo stuff.  And it often feels like that.  Like some loopy, cult-like phenomenon.  

Whoops.  I am not trying to sound so stupid about all of this.  I am the self effacing type and I think I’m the same with my faith.  

Let me tell you some of the good parts…

1)  Believing that the creator of the universe loves you and would give so much to rescue people like us is a very nice thought.  I find great comfort in my belief that God is so insanely in love with us.  And it also helps me in my interactions with others.  I mean, if you saw another person and you believed that God loved them hugely and profoundly, wouldn’t you treat them differently?  And then add to that the thought that God loves EVERYBODY with the same miraculous love… wouldn’t thinking that way change things a little?

2) Another good thing about being a Christian is that I know that I am not alone… I mean, even as I sit here in a coffee shop on a Tuesday night I can overhear several conversations around me and you know what some of these people are talking about?  GOD!  They are talking about what God is doing in their lives.  And they are not crazy people.  This isn’t a nut house.. it’s a coffee house  (I know, I know!  Some coffee shops are like nut houses, you don’t have to tell ME that!)  But what I am trying to say is that as crazy as it is to believe that Jesus was real, guess how much crazier it is to open up your eyes anywhere you go in the year 2009 and see so many real people who still believe in this story.  How crazy is it that these people’s lives are built so firmly on their faith in Christ?  And how crazy is it what these people are capable of?

3)  Third good thing about being a Christian… Well, it has to do with security.  And this is not too far from # 1.  To trust God with your life, with your soul, with everything that you are… there is great security in that.  There is a great freedom in that.  There is so much deep peace in the thought that you can depend, that you can rely on God.  And that He is faithful, that He can carry you (when there is only one pair of footsteps in the sand…).  God is very good at being God.  He can’t be beat.  He is able to do quite a bit, it’s wild.  And I know it’s hard when people are insulting you for your faith, calling you a fool.  You know what I remember when they say stuff like that to me?  I remember that God is God and that nothing anybody can say or do or spit can change that.  And then I remember how in my life it isn’t just a feeling.  It is the solid rock that my life is built on.  And my life is awesome (and usually much better than those jerks’ lives anyway…).


Okay, that’s all for now.  I am not going to do an alter call from my blog.  I am just glad about this right now.  I don’t know what this means to you.  I just wanted to say it.  I don’t know what is going on with you.  It’s none of my business anyway.  Just talk to somebody about it.  People like to talk about this kind of stuff.

Anyway, if you’re not a Christian I hope you’re jealous of us now.  Thanks!

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